I Love This...That's Why

I dare you to train for a marathon and not have it change your life. - Susan Sidoriak

Last night I was feeling pretty cruddy.  Mentally, not physically.  After an incredible three-and-a-half months of hard training, I've battled some aches and pains in my calf and foot that just happen to have crept up at the exact same time that my IT Band gave out before Boston.  Throughout most of training, I've shocked myself, running splits I never thought possible, and with each run, I gained confidence.  With every surprisingly fast split, I got more and more excited about what I could be capable of in NYC.  This recent bump in the road certainly knocked my confidence down few notches, and I was feeling it last night.  I started to write a blog post, but I never published it, though I can't really pinpoint why.  I'm really glad I kept that one under wraps, because I think that, in doing so, it lead me to this one.  And this one is phenomenal.

Carrying Mikey with me in NYC

I am a firm believer in the idea that people come into your life at just the right time, and I think you often don't really know why for some time.  When some friends of mine heard that I was struggling with my calf, they referred me to Chad, a friend of theirs who'd just started a PT practice nearby.  I've been seeing him for about three weeks, working the kinks out of my left leg, and it's made a world of difference.  Today's session, though, that's the one that's going to have the most effect on my NYC Marathon run.

Chad knew about my pre-Boston Marathon week, and the way I absolutely fell apart.  He knew that I let the enormity of running 26.2 miles get so far into my head, it kept me from eating and sleeping properly. I didn't enjoy that week as much as I should have because I was so consumed with nerves.  After today's session, he asked me how I was doing, and I knew he wasn't asking about my leg.  I told him I was scared. I actually told him a lot of what was in last night's post, and he shared with me a marathon story of his own that I know I'll draw upon next Sunday, and then he asked me a simple question:

Why are you doing this?

Seems strange, but it took me a little time to really get at the truth.  I'm doing this because I love it.  I absolutely love running, challenging myself, and becoming a better me with every mile I log.  I'm running from Staten Island to Central Park because I love to run, and NYC was an opportunity to do what I love in honor of my nephew Mikey and support BCH.  

People talk about mantras they have when they are struggling on a long run, and I'd never found one that fit me quite right.  Chad helped me find mine today. It captures everything I need to focus on when I'm getting settled into my rhythm, and when the hills creep up, and if any twinges pop up along the way.

I Love This

I don't have anything to be afraid of, because as I make my way through Brooklyn and Queens, up through Manhattan and into Central Park, I'll be doing something I love, and isn't that what life is all about?